You're Living Your Most Affordable Future

Every family seems to know someone like this. For years they talk about moving. Not next month, but someday. Maybe when the market settles down. Maybe after the kids go to college. Maybe once the grandchildren are a little older. They know exactly where they want to go. They've driven through the neighborhoods. They've looked at hundreds of houses online. Sometimes they'll send you a listing and say, "This is exactly what we're looking for."

Then another year goes by. Eventually people begin supplying explanations. They don't really want to move. They're afraid of change. They've gotten comfortable. Maybe they can’t afford it. Those explanations all seem reasonable enough. The curious part is that the people saying they want to move usually sound sincere. They aren't pretending. If you asked whether they'd rather wake up tomorrow in the new house or the old one, most would choose the new house without hesitation.

Imagining the new house is easy. Walking through it in your mind costs almost nothing. Browsing listings on a quiet Sunday afternoon is nearly free. None of those futures asks you to leave your neighbors, sell your house, change your routines, find new doctors, explain your decision to family, or wonder six months later whether you made a mistake.  Thinking about doing something and doing it are totally different cost weighting systems. The cheapest version of most futures is imagining it. And, cheap wins. 

The same pattern quietly appears everywhere else. Someone has been talking about writing a book for years. They've read books about writing, watched interviews with authors, bought notebooks, highlighted passages, organized ideas, even introduced themselves as someone who's working on a book. Every one of those things feels connected to becoming a writer. The future they aren’t picking is the one that requires becoming the person who sits alone at a desk day after day when the work is difficult and nobody cares yet.

Someone else wants to get in shape. They buy running shoes, compare fitness watches, watch videos about nutrition, follow athletes online, and spend an hour researching the perfect workout plan. None of those things is exercise. They're the affordable version of becoming someone who exercises.

People often insist they really do want something, even after years of never doing it. They're usually telling the truth. They want the future, but what they haven't agreed to pay for is the future becoming reality. 

Most people never consciously take a look at their life and decide:

I'm not making a budget because seeing the numbers costs too much.

I'm saying yes to everyone because disappointing people costs too much.

I'm leaving the garage exactly the way it is because deciding what to keep costs too much.

I'm not applying for the job because rejection costs too much.

I'm keeping the peace because conflict costs too much.

I'm putting off the phone call because hearing the answer costs too much.

I’m living my exact life today because another one costs too much.

 

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